DEVELOP YOUR COMMUNICATION SKILL
There are a number of situations when you need to solicit good information from others; these situations include interviewing candidates, solving work problems, seeking to help an employee on work performance, and finding out reasons for performance discrepancies.
Skill in communication involves a number of specific strengths. The first we will discuss involves listening skills.
The following lists some suggests for effective listening when confronted with a problem at work: · Listen openly and with empathy to the other person · Judge the content, not the messenger or delivery; comprehend before you judge · Use multiple techniques to fully comprehend (ask, repeat, rephrase, etc.) · Active body state; fight distractions · Ask the other person for as much detail as he/she can provide; paraphrase what the other is saying to make sure you understand it and check for understanding · Respond in an interested way that shows you understand the problem and the employee's concern · Attend to non-verbal cues, body language, not just words; listen between the lines · Ask the other for his views or suggestions · State your position openly; be specific, not global · Communicate your feelings but don't act them out (eg. tell a person that his behavior really upsets you; don't get angry) · Be descriptive, not evaluative-describe objectively, your reactions, consequences · Be validating, not invalidating ("You wouldn't understand"); acknowledge other;'s uniqueness, importance · Be conjunctive, not disjunctive (not "I want to discuss this regardless of what you want to discuss"); · Don't totally control conversation; acknowledge what was said · Own up: use "I", not "They"... not "I've heard you are noncooperative" · Don't react to emotional words, but interpret their purpose · Practice supportive listening, not one way listening · Decide on specific follow-up actions and specific follow up dates A major source of problem in communication is defensiveness. Effective communicators are aware that defensiveness is a typical response in a work situation especially when negative information or criticism is involved. Be aware that defensiveness is common, particularly with subordinates when you are dealing with a problem. Try to make adjustments to compensate for the likely defensiveness. Realize that when people feel threatened they will try to protect themselves; this is natural. This defensiveness can take the form of aggression, anger, competitiveness, avoidance among other responses. A skillful listener is aware of the potential for defensiveness and makes needed adjustment. He or she is aware that self-protection is necessary and avoids making the other person spend energy defending the self. In addition, a supportive and effective listener does the following: · Stop Talking: Asks the other person for as much detail as he/she can provide; asks for other's views and suggestions · Looks at the person, listens openly and with empathy to the employee; is clear about his position; be patient · Listen and Respond in an interested way that shows you understand the problem and the other's concern · is validating, not invalidating ("You wouldn't understand"); acknowledge other;'s uniqueness, importance · checks for understanding; paraphrases; asks questions for clarification · don't control conversation; acknowledges what was said; let's the other finish before responding · Focuses on the problem, not the person; is descriptive and specific, not evaluative; focuses on content, not delivery or emotion · Attend to emotional as well as cognitive messages (e.g., anger); aware of non-verbal cues, body language, etc.; listen between the lines · React to the message, not the person, delivery or emotion · Make sure you comprehend before you judge; ask questions · Use many techniques to fully comprehend · Stay in an active body state to aid listening · Fight distractions · ( if in a work situation) Take Notes; Decide on specific follow-up actions and specific follow up dates (dari berbagai sumber )
The following lists some suggests for effective listening when confronted with a problem at work: · Listen openly and with empathy to the other person · Judge the content, not the messenger or delivery; comprehend before you judge · Use multiple techniques to fully comprehend (ask, repeat, rephrase, etc.) · Active body state; fight distractions · Ask the other person for as much detail as he/she can provide; paraphrase what the other is saying to make sure you understand it and check for understanding · Respond in an interested way that shows you understand the problem and the employee's concern · Attend to non-verbal cues, body language, not just words; listen between the lines · Ask the other for his views or suggestions · State your position openly; be specific, not global · Communicate your feelings but don't act them out (eg. tell a person that his behavior really upsets you; don't get angry) · Be descriptive, not evaluative-describe objectively, your reactions, consequences · Be validating, not invalidating ("You wouldn't understand"); acknowledge other;'s uniqueness, importance · Be conjunctive, not disjunctive (not "I want to discuss this regardless of what you want to discuss"); · Don't totally control conversation; acknowledge what was said · Own up: use "I", not "They"... not "I've heard you are noncooperative" · Don't react to emotional words, but interpret their purpose · Practice supportive listening, not one way listening · Decide on specific follow-up actions and specific follow up dates A major source of problem in communication is defensiveness. Effective communicators are aware that defensiveness is a typical response in a work situation especially when negative information or criticism is involved. Be aware that defensiveness is common, particularly with subordinates when you are dealing with a problem. Try to make adjustments to compensate for the likely defensiveness. Realize that when people feel threatened they will try to protect themselves; this is natural. This defensiveness can take the form of aggression, anger, competitiveness, avoidance among other responses. A skillful listener is aware of the potential for defensiveness and makes needed adjustment. He or she is aware that self-protection is necessary and avoids making the other person spend energy defending the self. In addition, a supportive and effective listener does the following: · Stop Talking: Asks the other person for as much detail as he/she can provide; asks for other's views and suggestions · Looks at the person, listens openly and with empathy to the employee; is clear about his position; be patient · Listen and Respond in an interested way that shows you understand the problem and the other's concern · is validating, not invalidating ("You wouldn't understand"); acknowledge other;'s uniqueness, importance · checks for understanding; paraphrases; asks questions for clarification · don't control conversation; acknowledges what was said; let's the other finish before responding · Focuses on the problem, not the person; is descriptive and specific, not evaluative; focuses on content, not delivery or emotion · Attend to emotional as well as cognitive messages (e.g., anger); aware of non-verbal cues, body language, etc.; listen between the lines · React to the message, not the person, delivery or emotion · Make sure you comprehend before you judge; ask questions · Use many techniques to fully comprehend · Stay in an active body state to aid listening · Fight distractions · ( if in a work situation) Take Notes; Decide on specific follow-up actions and specific follow up dates (dari berbagai sumber )
